It’s okay to ask for help

Ed Mears - Business Development Manager, Supported Living - England and Wales

The act of caring is unlike any other one can experience during day-to-day life. Caring for someone, helping another, even just performing a simple act of kindness can make all the difference to not just that person’s day, but also to your own life.

I try to follow the old maxim “Treat others as you wish to be treated yourself.”

On a personal level, I try to make sure that I am a decent person to everyone I meet. I try to follow the old maxim “Treat others as you wish to be treated yourself.” and I’m sure that most people generally try to do that as well. But there is also another side to this that was explained to me very recently by a new friend that goes by the name of Big Ian Donaghy.


In the care world, Ian’s name is pretty well known within the realm of dementia awareness. His wholesome heart and his proactiveness in making lives better, has spread his reputation far and wide.


Listening to Ian present (in shorts) at the recent Care Show at the NEC, Birmingham he talked about the impact of kindness and caring for one another. Not only to the person who is receiving the help but also the person that is giving the help. It’s easy to be helpful to other people but actually, the benefit really only comes from people who are willing to be helped. That is something that is all too often overlooked because willing to be helped is weak - it is seen as neediness or dependency but sometimes that isn’t by choice.

Satisfaction in knowing how they could genuinely help people one step at a time.

Attending the Care Show we were fortunate enough to meet so many like-minded organisations and individuals who place care for others at the forefront of what they do. Of course there’s important business to be done, there’s networking and contacts to be made but really what was discussed was the necessity in the work that people undertook and the satisfaction in knowing how they could genuinely help people one step at a time. People who now had choices in life that once they didn’t, people who now have a home and connected family who once only had a four walls with a long distance relationship with their loved ones.


This all stems from caring. It doesn’t have to be big, it doesn’t have to be expensive, it can simply be telling your friends how good they look or letting someone know how you appreciate them. Sometimes you can’t see when someone needs help. We all put on brave faces when we are going through something difficult to get to the other side and sometimes forget that it’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to be cared for. As humans we have an innate ability and urge to help one another, some more than others, so why don’t we do it more?

This all stems from caring. It doesn’t have to be big, it doesn’t have to be expensive

Why don’t we, through everything that has happened over the past 2 years, with – yes the C word, Covid – with all the distance that has been put between your friends and family just, be kinder. We don’t need to let everyone know how much timber they’ve put on during lockdown or how much older they look since your last saw them. Just say it’s good to see you, then I am sure you can have a drink and berate them some after! Our key workers have been caring non-stop during this time and it is time we started to not just be caring to the ones who need it but also to everyone you meet. Who knows, you might make their day or even change your life.